You Teach Me
by I Have a Benediction
Summary: John Watson is the new chemistry professor at St. Bart's University. He has a problem child in his class by the name of Sherlock Holmes that he can't seem to stop thinking about. Uni!Lock, Eventual Johnlock. Contains: Drug abuse, Physical Abuse, Self Harm, Angst, Murder and Sex
1. The Problem Kid

**Hello to you all, this is my new fanfic, You Teach Me in which Sherlock is the student and John is the teacher. Hope you enjoy! Will update regularly, may be slightly slower than my other story Beginnings and Endings though. Read & Review! (: No, I don't own any of the characters. (DISCLAIMER). I'm also trying first person point of view so it may be a bit… weird until I get into it.  
Enjoy~**

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**(John's POV)**

I straightened out my beige jumper and grabbed my bag as I walked out the door. I am about to begin my first year teaching at St. Bart's University. I am going to be a Chemistry teacher for sophmores mostly. I hailed a taxi and said the address as I placed my bag on the vacant black seat next to me. I leaned my head against the window and sighed. Nervous was a word I could use to describe how I was feeling. _'What approach should I take? Make them fear me or love me? Machiavelli would choose fear but students like someone who relates to them…. What if I get a problem child?_' My mind was muddled with thoughts of worry and had me distracted for most of the car ride which was why when the cabbie said we had arrived I was rather surprised. I thanked him and gave him the required amount before rushing out.

I walked towards the school's threatening and overwhelming façade and took a deep breath. '_John Watson this is the beginning of your teaching career. You will be fine_.' I soothed myself down and much to my surprise actually worked. I opened the front door and headed to the main office. Seeing as I was a new professor I was a bit lost and wasn't sure where to go, fortunately I arrived an hour before hand so I could get better situated. I had been in this building a handful of times yet each time I swear they changed it. The woman in front smiled at me before introducing herself, "I'm Sarah, and I believe you are John Watson correct?" I nodded too caught up in my own thoughts to formulate words. "Yes, and what would you like help with?" I looked up at her finally breaking my thoughts and breathed in, "I just wanted a guide to my room. Can't bloody remember where it is." She laughed at this and I just smiled awkwardly. "I'll show you, just follow me." She smiled before standing up and gesturing for me to follow her.

As we walked I looked at her, she had long brown hair and brown eyes to match. Her body type was rather curvy and what most men would call attractive. Except I'm not like most men, I'm gay. Well, I haven't exactly come out of the closet per se but no one would blame me if they knew how my parents reacted when my sister came out. They near attacked her so I stay quiet. Once again due to my inner-musings I was too distracted to notice we had made it to our destination.

"Here you are Professor Watson."

I nodded as she walked away and proceeded into the classroom. I had only been there 4 times so being here again is like when you move and you're not quite used to the house yet. I walked over to my desk and placed my bag down and let out a sigh I was not aware I was holding in. I placed my keys on the mahogany desk and turned back around and left the room. I headed towards the teacher lounge. '_Might as well find out if I have any problem kids.'_

The room was directly below me so I rushed down the stairs. When I arrived I found 3 different teachers looking at me with slight apprehension. I looked around the room quickly, it was a typical teacher's lounge with a fridge a couch and a few throw pillows. After looking at my surroundings I looked back at the teachers in front of me. There was two men and one woman who looked exhausted. I nodded my head at them then approached them and sat at the table parallel them.

"You're Watson I presume?"

"Yes."

"Welcome to Bart's!"

"Thank you."

"Anytime, I'm Professor Dimmock, have any questions?" the burly man in front of me cleared his throat, crossed his legs and stared at me in anticipation. I nodded signifying that I indeed had questions before I took out a folded paper from my jean pocket. I handed the paper to the man adjacent to me. "This is my class roster. I wanted to know if I had any problem kids." Dimmock looked at the list before crinkling his nose in disgust. "Yes you have one." I looked at him anticipating who my lucky pupil was.

"Sherlock Holmes."

"Sherlock Holmes? What's so bad about him?"

Dimmock laughed unsure of what to say, "You'll see."

I swallowed slightly curious and worried as to who this '**Sherlock Holmes**' was. The name was interesting enough in itself. I looked down at my wrist watch and saw that I had 30 minutes before class started and quickly excused myself, thanking Dimmock for the information. I left the room and went straight back to my classroom. I opened the door and began to situate myself and surprisingly did it all in under 10 minutes. For the remainder 20 I decided to sit down and relax.

* * *

My watch began beeping and woke me with a start. I must have taken a power nap… I looked down to see class was starting and students were beginning to fill the room. '_Great way to present yourself John… Great._' I stood up and began writing my name on the board and waited for all the students to arrive. I crossed my legs and examined the room. There were at least 20 students present and all of them either held a face of boredom or one of excitement.  
It took another 5 minutes before all 56 students of mine arrived in the class room. I walked away from the front of the room and closed the door. I walked back to the front and deeply breathed in, "Hello, I am Professor Watson. I am your Chemistry Professor. I hope you enjoy this class and the company. I am going to begin roll call, if you go by a name other than the one I call you please tell me." I smiled and looked at all the young faces. 'Good John this is going well.'  
I began calling names and a few would say they went by a shortened version of their name. Everything was very routine until I had finally reached the name I was so antsy about, "Sherlock Holmes?" I began to look around the room in search for this character before hearing a distant "Here" from the back of the room. I looked in that direction to see a tall boy who seemed unrealistically thin. He had black curly hair and blue eyes that seemed almost calculating. He had high cheekbones as well. I observed him and found him much to my surprise as beautiful. '_John! He's a student!_'

I broke away from my thoughts of Sherlock and began the lesson. Halfway through I looked around the room and noticed one thing, Sherlock was on his phone. '_A problem child that doesn't listen in class… great._' "Sherlock Holmes? Can you please repeat what I just said?" I stopped pacing the room and looked at him daringly. He looked up from the mobile and glared at me, "No I can't." Of course he couldn't. "Well then I suggest you actually begin to pay attention to me." I turned around and was about to begin my lesson before he muttered, "I was paying attention." This piqued my interest so I instigated an argument, which in hind sight was probably not the most intelligent thing I have done. "Oh if you were paying attention then prove it Mr. Holmes." I looked at him and tilted my head showing him I was curious. He looked at me straight in the face before taking a deep breathe in, "You hold yourself in a military like fashion and I assume you had intended to join the army but they denied you. Why? You have an alcoholic brother who recently separated from his spouse making your relationship rocky. You also want to be a doctor so I presume this is a job to help feed your educational needs." He stopped and breathed in and looked at me. "How… That was…." I bit my tongue before I said amazing. '_How… How did he know all of that…?_' Several students started yelling "Freak" before I reprimanded them. "Sherlock please come see me during lunch." I breathed in and tried to ignore what had just happened and continued on with my lesson but throughout it all I couldn't get this eccentric boy out of my mind.


	2. Lunch Meetings and Meanings

**Hello there, here is the second chapter of You Teach Me (Obviously). Read & Review! PM with any concerns /complaints and I can try to help. I will try to update more regularly. Some obvious beginnings of Johnlock in here. Angst in the next few chapters. (You have been warned.)  
Enjoy! ~  
**_  
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**(Sherlock's POV)  
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"Sherlock please come see me during lunch."  
_The words kept echoing in my head. Lunch would begin in 10 minutes and I would have to go to Mr. Watson's class and be deemed a freak yet again. I sighed out and looked up at the board. The teacher made a mistake. How dull, a math teacher who couldn't even do something as simple as use Delta correctly. I looked back down at the desk carved with varying forms of "Sherlock is a Freak". I sighed heavily this time, why does being intelligent make me a freak. How petty that you let something like intimidation rule you.

I began reciting pie and chose to do that for the rest of class. Eventually the bell rang and I darted up. I grabbed my bag and dashed out of the room. I made my way outside and to a section of the school that was deserted. I am going to go to Watson's but if I was; I was going to bloody smoke first. I leaned against the brick building behind me and dug through my long coat until I pulled out a carton of cigarettes and my lighter. I took a fag out and lit it, inhaling it deeply and shutting my eyes. I exhaled in pleasure. The sudden feeling of calmness and stability overwhelmed me. I took another long drag before putting it out and making my way back to the building. I had wasted 5 minutes of my lunch doing what would eventually put me in an early grave, yet somehow I don't care. It's better than what I want to be doing... That'll have to wait though. I went up the stairs and walked down the halls and stopped in front of Professor Watson's door. Room 13 the Chemistry Room. I opened the door and poked my head in.

* * *

Inside I saw Professor Watson sitting looking at me expectantly. '_Crossed legs, cell phone in close proximity, clear agitation. Conclusion: He had just gotten off the phone with a family member who he clearly doesn't get along with. Most likely his brother Harry, they were probably talking about his ex-wife Clara._' My mind raced as I stepped in and took a seat next to Watson's desk. He looked up at me about to confront me. I looked at him but in my peripheral vision I saw his I.D. and my curiosity got the better of me. 22 years old… John H. Watson… John, I much prefer calling him that. "Sherlock, hello."  
I looked at him and his facial expressions, he seemed almost relieved that I arrived…  
"John."

"Excuse me?"

"Sorry, I meant Professor Watson…" I muttered under my breath.

"Good… how did you know my name?"

"Your I.D…"

John smiled a bit at this, he seemed almost relieved that I hadn't been stalking him though I wouldn't be surprised if he still thought that, in fact, based off his thumb I know for a fact he still does…

"So, onto the reason I had you come in…"

"Oh yes, that…" I looked down at the floor trying to avoid John's gaze knowing what was ahead and not liking it.

"How did you know those things about me Sherlock?"

"I didn't know."

"Oh come then, you obviously did. Did you look me up on the internet?"

"No."

"Then how did you know all that?"

I closed my eyes trying to blink away this situation with no avail. I knew I would have to explain it to him, I just didn't want to. He is going to know I'm a freak and I was really hoping at least one of my teachers wouldn't this year… just one… at this point any one… "I deduced it."

"You deduced it?"

"Yes."

"I'm not following, Sherlock care to expound?"

"Let's see, your admiration for the military was apparent in the way you stood and your hair cut, clean cut and pristine. Doctor? The way you look at us is like a doctor would look at their patient yet you're too young to have become a doctor then retired to be a teacher so you are still in the process of becoming one. Your brother and your's relationship is transparent in your mobile phone. It says 'Harry Watson, From Clara' So obviously it has had a previous owner, that and its far too expensive for someone like you still studying to be a doctor would make you slightly financially compromised and on a teacher salary. Now, the phone is fairly modern and technologically advanced and screams wife. Yet it has multiple scratches, state of the relationship there. So they are split up. Lastly, the drinking, that was a bit of a shot in the dark, the scuff marks around the charging port show those late nights when he would try to plug it in but his hands were shaking. Never see a sober man's phone with them or a drunk's without."

John looked at me with his mouth slightly gaped open, "That was …bloody… amazing…"

I turned my head at this, _'amazing? That's a new one…'_

"You think so?"

"Yes, of course…. Truly amazing…"

I looked at John and almost smiled but caught myself and stopped.

"That's not what people usually say…"

"What do they usually say?"

"Piss off."

John chuckled at this and I even smirked. After a few moments John looked at me again as if trying to size me up, he had a glint of fascination in his eyes before I saw them look, actually look at me. In specific my face, as if he were searching for something. His eyes suddenly widened as if finding what he had been searching for, but the bell indicating lunch was over rang before he could share his finding. I got up and took my bag. Just as I was about to leave John called after me, "Sherlock, if you want to come back tomorrow you can… I'd like you to…" I smiled and nodded my head before leaving the room. '_John didn't think I was a freak and wanted me to return?' I felt something just then, it's almost like friendship but what am I thinking? John is my teacher._

* * *

The day and all of my classes passed just as tediously as they do even with it being the start of a new year. I walked to the school dorm building and went to my room. I opened the door and was greeted to an empty dorm, which meant my roommate was out. Perfect. Taking it as an invitation I went to my drawer and pulled out a small black leather box. I took out the objects inside, a rubber, a needle, a lighter, and a bag of cocaine. I smiled at the objects inside and at the prospect of a night alone to sit and just think about everything and nothing all at once.  
I took out a spoon and placed the white powder on top of it and some water and lit the flame underneath until it was the familiar boiled liquid. I took it and put it into the needle and prepped my arm for injection. As I injected myself I felt a slight pinch before I pushed the plunger down and the fire coursed through my veins in pure bliss.

I put the objects and box back and plopped onto my bed. I began flexing and unflexing my arm staring at the ceiling. I let my mind clear itself which worked when suddenly John appeared. John my teacher, my incredibly attractive teacher. The one who accepted me and wanted me and my presence. I smiled like a mad man at the thought of John. I felt my eyes start to droop and let them content with drifting into a sleep filled with thoughts of John. _  
_


	3. The Week Ends

**Hello and welcome back to You Teach Me. If you haven't seen series 3 please watch it I'm in a perpetual state of laughing and crying anyways. Here's the third chapter, which I warn will have some angst so (: Plus, with Sherlock series 3 out will you all even read fan fiction anymore? Donn'ttt llleeeavveeee.  
Also check out my other fic Beginnings and Endings if you'd like: s/9886615/1/Beginnings-and-Endings  
Thanks a bunch for the reviews and follows (:  
Enjoy!~**

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**(John's POV)**

I straightened out my black and white striped sweater as I began pacing the room. Today was Friday the last day of the first week of school. Normally, I would be excited to get a break from work and I'll admit I was but I wasn't excited to leave Sherlock alone. We have been having lunch every day for the past week, albeit we were silent for majority of the time spent I learned some new things about my student. One, he was a proper genius. Two, he didn't have any friends, aside from me. _'Did Sherlock even consider me a friend? Another thing to ask on my bucket list then…' _Lastly, he was getting beaten by somebody. I noticed on the first day we had met up with each other…

_I tried to hold in my laughter as 'piss off' but failed to and began to chuckle. I looked at Sherlock to make sure I didn't offend him to find he was also smiling at it. After a few moments I looked at Sherlock again trying to size him up, categorize, I was truly fascinated by this boy until I finally looked at him, not at who he was but at his actual person, in specific his face. My eyes widened at what I did see, 'Faintly bruised under eye and slight swelling of the lip.' Any normal person would never been able to spot it because of how subtle it was, but I was training to be a doctor and of course I would see it. I was about to ask him about it but then the bell rang interrupting me and Sherlock was already half way out the door. I wanted to know to the point where it felt like I needed to know so just before Sherlock was out the door I called after him, "Sherlock, if you want to come back tomorrow you can… I'd like you to…" Sherlock smiled and nodded at me and I relaxed in my chair. I could ask him all the questions I wanted to tomorrow… though that wasn't the only reason. I liked him. I fancied him. 'What are you thinking John, he. Is. Your. Student.'_

* * *

I shook away the memory and continued pacing. I had asked him the day afterwards what the bruise and lip were from but he stayed mute and did so the day after and the day after. I was beginning to give up hope but somehow I felt like today was different. I feel like today he'll actually tell me. If not I'll be overwhelmed with worry not seeing him for 2 days. That didn't seem ideal considering I was beginning my internship at Bart's hospital to become a doctor this weekend as well. I looked down at my watch to see how long I had been pacing the classroom, '_7:30'_. Class would begin in 15 minutes which meant I had just enough time to begin writing today's lesson on the board. My mind was full of too many things for me to actually speak to my students and teach today so I opted to making them take notes from the chemistry text book.

I finished the last of the instructions on the board as the first few students began filing into class. I caught a glimpse of Sherlock as I turned from the board and I smiled at him. He smiled back at me shyly before sitting in his desk and getting out his phone. I blushed slightly when he smiled, not enough for anyone to notice but enough to where I noticed. _'I was just being polite. I do not fancy my student. Why would I? That's illegal. Who cares if when he smiles it is slightly lopsided and makes him seem goofy in the most adorable way possible? Who cares that whenever he ruffles his hair all that you want to do is grip his locks and pull him into a kiss? Who cares how deep and blue his eyes are? Certainly not me!'_ I looked down trying to ignore how in denial I actually sounded before the bell rang and I knew I would have to transition from school girl thoughts to actual adult teaching thoughts. I walked towards my desk and sat down and tried to make myself look busy as they began to work. I looked across the room, everyone was working except for 1 student, Sherlock. I wasn't surprised at all that he wasn't working on his assignment in fact, I had noticed this throughout the week. Sherlock was a genius meaning he could do nearly anything I handed him but because he was a genius he wouldn't do it. He would deem all work "dull" or "too simple" so he would refuse to do it. It frustrated the hell out of me, but it seemed that he wouldn't budge from his opinion. I couldn't make him do the work and he wasn't going to do it anytime soon.

The class went surprisingly fast, I mean probably because I spent majority of my time staring at Sherlock but details aren't that important… My other two classes were boring in comparison to my first, but how wouldn't they be? Sherlock wasn't in them. _'Stop that right now!'_ I'm really starting to worry myself… Surely I wouldn't like my student. No, that's weird, besides I hardly know a thing about him. I looked at my watch and saw that it was finally lunch time. This had surprisingly become my favorite part of the day if only because of all the little meetings I had with him.

I began getting my lunch out and crossed my legs waiting for Sherlock before I began. I had not once seen Sherlock eat a lunch… that's weird… I wonder why that is… I pondered it before connecting his thinness and lack of food. I chose to now draw conclusions and ask him instead. I stared at the door as the seconds went by. The clock became my heart beat as time kept going while I waited for Sherlock. It took about 10 minutes until the door handle turned and Sherlock waltzed right in like he always did, but somehow different. He seemed more energetic than usual. Probably found some dead animal or something. I smiled as he sat down on the chair parallel to me.

* * *

"Sherlock."

He smiled and nodded his head back at me as he looked away. His knee was bouncing and he was tapping his fingers furiously_. 'Odd…'_

"So why so late?"

"Was doing something."

"Ah." I tried my hardest not to show my anxiety, '_something could mean anything…' _

Sherlock looked at me and sighed heavily, "You have questions."

I breathed in and shut my mouth, somehow I was still amazed when he deduced things. I still can't figure out how he bloody does it.

"Yes."

"Then ask."

"Alright…" I licked my lips then continued, "I noticed that every day you don't have lunch…Why?"

"Not hungry."

"But you need to eat."

Sherlock waved his hand dismissively and I began feeling suspicious.

"When was the last time you ate?"

"Yesterday." I looked at him, he was avoiding eye contact.

"Don't lie to me."

"I'm not."

"You are, Sherlock tell me the truth. I want to know."

He breathed in a deep sigh then looked at me in the eyes, "What's the day today?"

"Friday."

"Sunday."

"Sherlock! That's …" I began counting the days in my head before I continued, "5 days!" '_He hasn't eaten in 5 days?' _I was beginning to feel sick with worry for the boy.

"Yes."

"Are you anorexic?" I asked with a panicky tone_. '5 days!?'_

Sherlock scoffed at this, "Please John, not eating doesn't mean I'm anorexic."

"Mr. Watson." I corrected him used to him calling me John by now. "Then what would you call it?"

"Nothing, eating is just a waste of precious time."

"Sherlock eating is necessary for living!"

"I do eat, just the bare minimum."

"It's not healthy Sherlock."

"John I don't care! My body is just transport. Why should I care?"

I could tell he was beginning to get irritated by the conversation. I couldn't care less.  
"I care Sherlock."

"You do?" He looked at me puzzled as if the concept for foreign to him.

"Of course… You're my student Sherlock."

He hmmed in response to me and I could tell the conversation was over in his mind. I made a reminder on my phone to begin making him lunches as well, sod him. If he won't care enough to eat then I'll make him.

"You have other questions."

"Yes, thanks for the reminder. A few days ago… I noticed the bruise under your eye and swelled lip… ever planning to tell me what they are from?"

"Irrelevant. Don't you ever get tired of that question?"

I felt rage begin to boil inside of me. '_Irrelevant?'_ "No, not irrelevant tell me Sherlock."

"Why do you care?"

"Because I do!"

Sherlock turned his head and looked as though he was sulking. If I weren't so mad at him I would tell him how ridiculous he looked. '_And how adorable… No. John now is not the time for that.' _

"I was beat up." Sherlock muttered it quietly, barely audible. But I heard him.

"B-by who?" I couldn't hide the surprise in my voice,_ 'he finally admitted it...'._

"Irrelevant."

I almost began to push him before deciding him telling me anything at all was progress and I shouldn't push it. I looked at my watch and noticed lunch would end in 2 minutes so opted to instead properly wish Sherlock a nice weekend.

"Well, I'll see you next week Sherlock. Please don't get into trouble… and tell me next time someone hurts you… it's not right…" I smiled trying to show that I accepted him and he could trust me.

He looked at me and smiled back, a smile that seemed different than the others, seemed almost… _genuine_.

"Of course John. Good luck at your internship."

I smiled, I never told him about the internship. Brilliant. I held out my arms and pulled Sherlock in for a hug and he looked at me bewildered and flinched at my contact before patting my back. I let go and let him walk out. I sat back down and thought about his hug before my last class started, '_His warmth, He smelled of antiseptic and cigarettes… how very Sherlock… wait, cigarettes…? No, surely not, just another question to ask…' _I left my thoughts to wander on their own and let my class begin. Thoughts filled with Sherlock and my internship and the weekend.


	4. An Ultimatum and New Connection

**Hello there my lovelies. I am so glad to see you all again. Thanks so much for all the feedback and stuff. I love every single one of you (:  
Updates may or may not slow down a tad bit because I will be participating in a musical but I will still update. I hate when people discontinue their fics! So Read & Review**

**Enjoy!~**

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**(Sherlock's POV)**

I laid on my bed in my dorm and stared at the ceiling. Weekends were always so dull. I mechanically lifted myself up to see my roommate getting dressed for an event. The boy who called himself Rupert was straightening the cuffs on his pastel blue button down. Obviously this wasn't a first date and he planned to ask her to go steady with him, _'Tedious, dull, transparent.' _Rupert looked at me strangely, I had forgotten I was staring and I looked away quickly.

"Sherlock…"

"Rupert."

"Why are you looking at me?"

"Just observing."

"Whatever, mate. Hey, I'm going out don't cause too much trouble while I'm gone alright?"

"I'll try."

Rupert smirked at me before leaving the room leaving me alone for the umpteenth time, having a roommate that was sociable had its perks due to my absolute loathing of social interaction. I then thought about Rupert and how accepting he was. Most people upon meeting me are intimidated or repulsed and would rather slit their wrists than be near me.

_"Hello there mate! I'm Rupert, and you are…?"_

_I looked at the boy, he had brown wavy hair that went almost to his shoulders and freckles scattered across his face and green eyes. He was wearing a light blue pastel shirt and some jeans underneath, obviously going to a party on his first night which is not too far away. He had a handbag over his chest with many tears and lines indicating it was very old and used, obviously due to his financial situation. He had shoes that were worn but only on the soles of them meaning he does a lot of walking, probably does sports. He was also hunching showing how submissive and insecure he was._

_I broke away from all my deductions and flashed a fake smile, "Sherlock."_

_"Pleasure to meet you."_

_"Hmm."_

_"I'm about to go off, but is there anything I need to know about you considering we're going to be roommates?"_

_I smirked, I had learned it was better to keep my mouth shut and not say my deductions but their faces were always so irresistibly hilarious. "Well, let's see I play the violin when I'm bored, I don't speak for days and sometimes I do drugs. Enough about me, here's what I know about you, I know you haven't seen your dad for at least a year, I know that you're financially unstable and I know that you're in sports, track perhaps? No, more likely that it's rugby."_  
_I smiled and waited for the stupid look on his face however all I got was a smile. 'Why was he smiling?'_

_"Whoa! Mate, how'd you do that? You'll have to tell me later, I'm off."_

_I blinked several times and he smiled and dashed out the room. He didn't call me a freak… he didn't tell me to piss off or threaten me… he just seemed impressed…Just like my chemistry professor did earlier today…._

* * *

I stopped remembering and looked around. I had felt so off lately, with all these people suddenly accepting me I felt like logic no longer existed. Oh how I missed the cool and calculating cut of logic. Suddenly a wave of something hit me, boredom. I was bored, so bored. I got up and grabbed my coat and scarf and left the dorm room. I knew exactly where I was going, I was going to Victor Trevor's to get what I neede- no… wanted. Needed would mean I'm an addict. I'm not, I don't have shakes when I don't have it and I don't have to have it, I just used it when I was bored.

* * *

**~2 Hours Later~**

I leaned against Victor's couch and breathed out a low moan of relief and pleasure as I pushed the plunger down. Victor was sitting directly next to me snorting 3 lines before lifting his head up, aggressively, and smiling at me. He was 18 years old and I was 17 when I first met him…

_"Boring"_

_"I don't care Sherlock! You will finish your education and then go to university!"_

_I heaved out in frustration before darting out the front door without another word and left. I began running, mostly to avoid being caught by Mycroft so soon._

_I kept running and eventually found myself in a shady part of downtown London. I looked to the left and right, stopping to catch my breath. In the corner of my eye I saw a boy, he was tan and had brown hair that was shaved on the left side. I looked him up and down as deductions flowed through my head, 'Drug Dealer' was one of the few that caught my attention. I had read about drugs and they seemed intriguing but never something I would ever truly consider using but… I was so bored and angry…I began walking again and approached the boy leaning against the brick wall smoking._

_He looked up from the ground and grinned at me, "Hello there."_

_"Hello."_

_"Did you want something kid?"_

_"Yes."_

_"What would that be?"_

_"What do you have?"_

_He seemed surprised that I had caught on to the fact that he was a drug dealer but nonetheless obliged to my request and showed me his inventory. This surprised me because I had thought he wouldn't be so trusting, for all he knew I could have been in cahoots with the Yard._

_"See anything you fancy?" he smirked at me before taking the last drag of his fag and stomping it out on the ground below him with his black combat boots and getting out another one._

_"'Would you like one?"_

_I looked at him and then back at the cigarette, I had never smoked before but I knew what it did to the brain, I knew the chemicals behind it and it seemed so intriguing…_

_"Sure, thanks." I said to him before reaching out my hand and grabbing it, putting it to my lips he lit it for me and I nodded my head and inhaled. I had thought I would cough but I didn't. Instead I felt calmer… It was odd, yet somehow I liked it._

_"All good mate, surprised, didn't strike you as a smoker, though looking at you posh boy I would say you have never done drugs either…"_

_I looked at him in slight confusion. He wasn't stupid as I had originally labelled him, just naïve then…_

_"Never too late to try. Yes, so back to the matter at hand…" I redirected our conversation trying hard to not overthink my choice. I was upset and angry at Mycroft and bored…so bored… perhaps this could help._

_"Yeah mate, what do you want? I got some weed, ecstasy, LSD..."_

_"Cocaine." I cut him off knowing exactly what effects I would desire and what drug would give me that._

_"Well, for a first timer I gotta say you sure don't play around." The boy chuckled then handed me a bag of white powder._

_"How much?" I asked while I examined the bag._

_"Hmm, since it's your first time I'll say 30 pounds."_

_Luckily for me I had always carried around at least a hundred so I reached into my trousers pocket and pulled out the correct amount of money and handed it to him._

_"Thanks mate, I'm Victor by the way, and you are?"_

_"Sherlock."_

_"Alright, Sherlock, I hope to see you around soon." He smiled before slipping me a small note with a number on it and walking away._

* * *

The memory faded from the forefront of my mind when Victor began speaking to me.

"You know, you will have to pay soon…"

"I will when Mycroft gives me my weekly allowance…"

"I'm not waiting."

"I don't have the money for it right now…"

"You can pay in another way…"

I immediately knew what he meant, yet somehow I felt indifferent to it. Perhaps the cocaine had numbed my judgment as I leaned in to kiss Victor. He returned it without a moment's hesitation. My eyes slowly closed and I slipped my tongue in and his and mine began dancing. _'Oh John…' _My eyes snapped open and I pulled away from a confused looking Victor.

"You alright Sherlock?"

"Yeah… just…I have to go…"

"Alright… but you still do owe me you know. See you around very soon." He gave me a devilish smirk as I grabbed my coat and baggie of coke and darted out. I began to walk down the street. _'Why was I thinking about my teacher? Like that especially!' _It all seems so ridiculous but I can't stop it… I kept walking still very confused… This was going to be a bad trip.

Had I not been so distraught or high I would have noticed when a car pulled up behind me. I would have noticed that I was being hand cuffed yet I couldn't bring myself to care. I was shoved into the car and was questioned.

The man who was questioning me was named Lestrade.

"What's your name?"

"Sh-Sherlock." I stuttered out still disoriented.

"How old are you?"

"17."

He flashed his torch in my eyes and I flinched. He noticed my pupils were dilated and took action.

"I'm going to search you."

I nodded obviously I had no choice in the matter.

He stood me up and began rummaging through my belongings before finding the offending bag.

"Cocaine… Yeah, you'll be coming with us."

I nodded as I was shoved back into the car.

The car ride itself wasn't that bad nor boring. It was silent yes, but I was still high and was therefore content. When we arrived he placed me in a holding cell and sat down on a chair in front of it.

"So Sherlock was it?"

"Yes."

"We contacted Mycroft Holmes and he is on his way."

"Obviously."

"Just telling you, don't get condescending on me you junkie." He growled at me.

"Don't get mad at me because you can't maintain a conversation with your fiancée without it ending with an argument. I doubt now is a good time to be quitting smoking."

He looked at me in complete surprise and slight amazement before his features returned to that of an angry man.

"How did you! You know what I don't care."

"I didn't know, I saw."

"Oh please."

"It's true."

"Prove it."

"Your hair is thinner in certain areas that would suggest that you have been pulling it out due to stress. Stress about your job seemed unlikely due to you not being that high in the ranks yet so must be a relationship. You wouldn't get that upset about a friendship so an intimate one then. Then there's the ring you're wearing. Clearly not a wedding ring but more to the nature of an engagement ring. So, you must be fighting with your fiancée and it's stressing you. Then there's the slight shake you have and the obvious irritation. It's a harder thing to notice and I wouldn't have been able to identify it if I hadn't withdrawn from nicotine myself before in the past." I stopped and stared at him waiting for the usual reaction, bored now that I was finally coming down.

"How did…that was brilliant… but you're also an unbelievable twit!" his emotions bounced from surprised and impressed to angry and irritated in an instant. Quitting now really wasn't the right time for him.

"T-thank you." I muttered out not sure quite how to respond.

"You know you are a proper genius Sherlock Holmes. You are attending college yes?"

"Yes."

"Don't drop out, why would you get addicted to this stuff?"

"I'm not addicted."

He snorted in disbelief, "Yeah sure. You know, I don't know how you expect to just leave, you have a possession charge. Obviously your brother can't just come in here and change that."

"If you actually looked, you would see he has a level seven clearing." I said it bluntly.

"That's ridiculous. Of course not, that's up there with the bloody minister himself!"

"And?"

Lestrade didn't seem to believe me, oh well he would eventually. I sat there before a sudden realization hit me, Mycroft was going to know. He was going to know I dabbled in drugs… I had kept it hidden very well for the past year… My mind began a panicky flurry as I realized this. Lestrade left after a few minutes of silence and returned with my brother.

"Sherlock, get up. We're leaving. We have a lot of talking to do."

I got up and waited as Lestrade opened the holding cell for me.

"You were right about the level seven thing… bloody impressive, you are so young!"

Mycroft nodded at him as we both began leaving the premises. We got into the car and left the Yard. We drove in silence. We arrived at the manor not too long after. I hadn't been here since the last summer after my first year of Uni. We went inside the building and went to the front room. We both sat in chairs parallel to each other before we both took deep breathes and began discussing matters.

"Drugs? Really Sherlock? Of all the ways to rebel."

"Sorry I didn't rebel with cake like you Mycroft."

"Grow up. Do I need to take you to a rehabilitation facility?"

"No."

"Why should I believe a junkie?"

"Because I am not a junkie. I was simply experimenting."

"I am going to give you the benefit of the doubt Sherlock. I am going to place more surveillance on you and if I see one more slip up I am putting you in a rehab."

"Fine." I turned my head and pouted. This was all so ridiculous.

"Take me back to the dorm."

Mycroft opened his mouth as if to argue before complying with my request and taking me there.

* * *

Saturday and Sunday were spent mostly in my dorm alone. Rupert was at his home visiting. Mycroft had upped the surveillance so I had to leave the dorm to shoot up or smoke but all in all the weekend seemed uneventful, tedious, boring, dull. The one thing that wasn't dull was John, which I would be seeing in 5 minutes when class started.

* * *

**So there's that. Sorry If it seemed a bit out of context with the rest of the story. I had to establish a few meetings and such. Also I plan to put some actual crimes and solving in the next chapter! I hope you liked it! Stay tuned~ **


	5. Murder and More Questions

**Hey all! 5****th**** chapter for you all. Show of hands who here is not emotionally ready for the finale of series 3? [[hand waving intensifies]] Anyways,I hope you liked it. Review and PM~  
Enjoy ~**

**(John's POV)**

I sat in my desk watching the clock, in just 5 minutes I could finally see Sherlock. The weekend was great, my internship was great,and everything had been great except for the lack of Sherlock. I couldn't help but feel anxious. I have only known this student for a week and yet here I was irrationally worried about him… constantly thinking about him… Him and his cheekbones, and his blue eyes that I always get lost in…_ 'Stop it! He is your student! What is wrong with you?'_ The bell rang and I stood up and opened the door to let all the students in. The first student that walked into my class was a girl named Molly Hooper. She was quiet and always did her work. She hardly spoke to anyone except for when she was required to. I looked away from the girl not interested any longer until I found Sherlock strut in and sit in his seat. He seemed different…

He had bags under his eyes that weren't there before and his hair seemed messier than usual. Surely he was just busy with friends_… 'Sherlock doesn't have friends though. The closest thing he has to a friend is me, which I won't deny I am prideful of… Then what was it?'_ Surely my bucket list of questions will end soon. I stopped thinking and focused myself back onto Sherlock to see that he was also focused on me. Somehow being the center of a genius's attention made me feel special…_'Damn it John! You have a class to teach!' _I got up from my desk and stood in front of the room, by now everyone was seated and waiting for class to begin.

"Hello everyone. I hope you all had great weekends!"

Everyone began muttering to themselves.

"Good, now then, the first week is over which means we are actually going to get to work!"

A collective groan.

"Oh surely you can't be that upset!"

Everyone looked at me blankly except for Sherlock, he was looking at me like… like what? I couldn't tell, but analyzing it would have to come later.

"Well, today we are going to get into pairs and do some simple chemical reactions and balancing of equations. High School stuff really, but review is something we have to do."

Everyone seemed pleased with the prospect of partners.

"So, everyone get with another and get out the necessary lab equipment and begin. You all know the safety precautions. I will be coming around so do not think for a second that you'll be able to pull anything over me!"

A few students chuckled.

I watched as all the students slowly got together leaving the misfits behind. The only two left at this point were Molly and Sherlock. Somehow I found myself not surprised to see Sherlock alone, he had apparently notoriously known as the school "freak" which I found not fitting in the slightest. Different sure, but a freak?

"Sherlock Holmes and Molly Hooper." I said as I approached them, luckily they were only two seats apart so I was sure Sherlock had time to analyze her and realize she was intelligent.

They looked at me expectantly.

"You two seem to be the only ones left so, please work together."

They both nodded before Sherlock looked at me.

"Jo- Professor Watson… I am finding it difficult to do group activity may I work alone."

I wish I could let him, he looked like I just put him on death row but there was no way I was going to give him special treatment.

"No, Sherlock I cannot give you any special treatment. You will be working with Molly here. She won't bite, right Molly?"

I looked over at the mousy haired girl.

"Y-yes… It would be a pleasure…"

"See, Sherlock, now get to work you don't want to fall behind."

I began walking away before seeing Sherlock flash me a death glare that I couldn't help chuckle about.

* * *

**(Sherlock's POV)**

Group work. How disgusting. Why do I have to work with someone to do something that I have known how to do since I was 11.

"Sherlock, Will you do this reaction next?"

"It has no reaction."

"But you haven't done it yet…"

"I have before, it's no reaction, just write that down."

The girl, Molly Hooper, listened to me. She was peculiar. She didn't seem to detest me at all… in fact she almost seemed happy when she was told to work with me. Her eyes were dilated, perhaps it's physical attraction…

"Molly Hooper."

"Y-yes…?"

"Do you hate me?"

It's worth a try.

"No…Why would I?"

A lie? No… she has been upholding eye contact…

"No reason, just curious."

"You know…Sherlock… that thing you did on the first day of school… it was good… Impressive…"

Impressive? Surely she meant to say weird or abnormal.

"Thank you…"

"Of course." She flashed a smile, a genuine smile at me.

She continued to do the lab and I stood and watched, telling her if she made any mistakes. Class ended rather quickly and we all went to our other classes, or at least I didn't. Today I didn't want to do any classes, aside from John's because well…_ 'Because what? Because you fancy him? Because he is the only person who accepts you for you…?' _ Sure, it's bad to fancy a teacher, but I just can't help it… His build is strong and sturdy and his eyes are blue. He has hair that reminds me of the beach and I can barely resist running my fingers through it, Perhaps it's my young adult hormones.

I found that I had unintentionally reached my destination. I was in downtown near where I stand every day and play the violin for passers-by. I placed my book bag down beside me and took my violin out of its case. I grabbed it and stood back up and positioned it for playing. I closed my eyes and began playing the prelude of Bach's Cello Suite No.1. Quickly I gained a crowd who would toss money in my case. I wasn't doing this for the money, though I will admit it was a nice bonus, I did it because I felt free when I played the violin. I felt like I had no limits but unfortunately the school put limits on my playing. I couldn't play during the weekdays which meant I had to find another place to play and downtown seemed to be a good match.

I played and played again, different songs varying from Bach to Beethoven for hours. Until I noticed it was about an hour or so before John's lunch hour began so of course I had to go back to the school. I grabbed my case and counted the money, there was 20 pounds. I placed my violin back in its case and grabbed my stuff and headed back to the University.

* * *

Upon arriving I was surprised of the new company at the school. There were several police cars and caution tape blocking an entire wing of the building. Naturally, it piqued my interest and I went towards it, completely disregarding the keep out tape. Inside was something that surprised me even more. A body. A murder! How interesting!

I had always wanted to investigate murders, ever since that boy Carl Powers…

I looked at the body_, 'It was a dead woman, a Uni student. She was wearing track shorts and a tank top, so an athlete._ _She had bruises around her neck so she was killed by strangulation. The hand prints were large so stereotypically that would mean a male. Wait, is that? Yes, that was Petra Childs from my English class… She had a rough relationship with her boyfriend Garrison. Garrison had a large build and was on the rugby team... he also frequented the gym… Of course… They had a row and he got a little too rough with her… How sloppy…'_

"Hey! You can't be back here!"

I broke from my deductions to see two men trying to get me away from the body. Logically, this now made me a suspect.

"What were you doing there?"

"Investigating."

"Hey kid! We're not here to mess around. What the hell are you doing back there! You're now a suspect in this murder!"

"Of course I am, how predictably dull. The killer is obviously Garrison Boog."

"How would you know, huh?"

"Is perhaps… detective Lestrade here…?"

"Yeah, why? Answer our questions!"

"If you get him I will answer them."

They grumbled something I couldn't hear before leaving to get Lestrade. It took only a two minutes.

"What is it…Sherlock?"

"Lestrade."

"What are you doing here…?"

"I know who your murderer is."

Lestrade's eyes widened a bit before he sat down in front of me.

"Well then?"

"Garrison Boog."

"How?"

"She has hand prints around her neck, so obviously strangulation, and I just happen to have known she and her boyfriend fought a lot."

"I'll look into it…Listen, Sherlock you can't just come onto crime scenes like that. I like you and I know you're a bloody genius, but I am not the only detective here."

"OK."

"I'll look into it okay? Just go back to class…"

Lestrade waited until I was out of the crime scene then began talking to a tall man. Hopefully telling him the solution. I looked at my phone to see I had 10 minutes before lunch with John. I hurried down to the chemistry lab and let myself in. John was sitting down with two lunch bags.

He smiled at the sight of me, "Hello Sherlock."

"John."

"How are you?"

_Elated because I just solved a murder faster than any yarder could have done, those idiots._

"Fine."

"How was your weekend?"

"Dull."

He chuckled, "Of course it was."

"Your internship went well."

"Yes it has."

I walked into the room more and sat down next to him.

" You have two lunches…"

"Yes." He handed me the other, "I made one for you."

"Why?"

"When was the last time you ate?"

His question caught me off guard, "Friday…"

"That's why!"

I groaned, he was going to make me eat this. I opened the bag and took out the sandwich and began eating it to his delight.

We finished the lunches in relative silence for 5 minutes before someone opened the door with force. It was Lestrade.

"Sherlock! You were right, the murderer was Garrison Boog… Oh sorry if I was interrupting something…"

John looked bewildered but I just smirked, "Of course I was right."

"Listen, thanks… I suppose… Just don't go on our crime scenes like that again…"

I nodded in acknowledgment but not in agreement.

"But, if we need your help… you know…I'll call you…if you want…Just stay out of trouble, I don't want to see you in a cell again okay? Have a nice day Sherlock."

He left and closed the door behind me.

What I was left with was a bewildered looking John.

"Sherlock…?"

"Yes, John?"

"Can you explain…?"

"There is a crime scene outside the Uni I just solved before coming here."

John looked at me for a while as if searching for a tail as if I was lying before realizing I was telling the truth.

"Sherlock, you can't just go on crime scenes!"

"Oh please spare me the lecture, I solved a murder."

"I…Fine… that's impressive that you can do that so young though…"

"It was hardly difficult, it was such a sloppy murder."

"Still Sherlock, you did it faster than the yarders."

"Hmmm, idiots…"

John's eyes widened at my blatant insult before he chuckled.

"So what did he mean, by in a cell…again?"

"I …uh… I was arrested two days ago…"

"Sherlock! What did you do?"

_You can't tell John the truth…_

"I was mistaken for a thief they had been looking for. A huge misunderstanding really."

"Sherlock, don't lie to me…"

"'John, I'm not."

"You are Sherlock."

"I can't tell you."

"Why not?"

_I didn't know how to react, I didn't know what to do. One part screamed to tell him, tell him the truth let him cradle me in his arms and tell me it was okay but the logical part of me told me to not say a thing._

"I just can't okay…"

"Sherlock…listen, I care, you can trust me…"

"No John, maybe one day…just not yet…"

This satisfied John, or at least made him shut up. Lunch went on in silence.

* * *

The next 4 weeks went on normally afterwards. He and I kept having lunches, slowly learning more and more about each other. I had actually began to trust him, and him me, we had become friends, very good ones, I had thought time would change the fact that I fancied him but it did not do anything but strengthen and solidify that fact. It was that 6th week that changed things up a bit.


	6. A New Development pt 1

**Hey there, sorry for such a halt in updates, I am officially booked with my musical. However I will not abandon ship! Especially S.S. Johnlock, Kidding, but seriously, I love writing this story and I love each and every one of you for feedback and just enjoying something I made.  
Anyways, As far as the story goes I hope to put more murders, etc. in it, because detective work just seems so paramount to Sherlock's personality it feels like almost a crime to leave it out.  
Read& Review**

**Enjoy!~**

* * *

**(John's POV)**

If anyone had told me beforehand what would happen, that this foreseen event would occur I would laugh and tell them to piss off. The past few weeks had been going on swimmingly, had felt like years even, Sherlock and I had learned a lot about each other. Albeit more than a normal teacher-student relationship required but then again what about the situation was even close to normal? A few of the negative things I learned were that for one, Sherlock was being bullied by some students in the class, specifically Sally Donovan and Philip Anderson. I found that no matter how many times I pleaded he refused to ask for help and would not press any charges against them. I learned that despite my best wishes Sherlock was a smoker. He smoked at least 1 pack of cigarettes a day. I learned that he had a brother named Mycroft who is "the British Government" as Sherlock so eloquently put it. I found that he and Mycroft have a bumpy and unexplainable relationship that started when Sherlock was younger and was led to believe he was stupid.

I also learned a lot of good things about Sherlock. I learned that he was brilliant at playing the violin. I learned that he actually did have a heart though it was small, it was present. I found that he knows how to dance, very well. I also found that he knew several languages some being French, Spanish, and Mandarin. I also learned that the more I found out about Sherlock the more I realized I knew nothing. As if each new revelation was just the surface. Hell, I still haven't gotten him to tell me why he was arrested, work in progress. All in all, conclusion of my lesson is that Sherlock Holmes was a brilliant, infuriating, beautiful, genius boy that I had fallen head over heels for.

The initial shock of realizing I loved my student was the most difficult part. I constantly scolded myself for it, told myself it was wrong but slowly that fight in me ceased and I accepted it. Next was what to do with it?

It wasn't like I could tell Sherlock I loved him, I was his teacher and we had only known each other for a month and a half. Surely he'd run in the opposite direction.

I couldn't tell Sherlock.

_'But why not? It's not as though you couldn't just return to being friends… Sherlock isn't one for sentiment. Maybe he even reciprocates feelings for you.'_

The thought that Sherlock would ever reciprocate feelings for me was baffling to say the least yet somehow I didn't want to drop the thought. I may not have known Sherlock very well but I did know that Sherlock didn't feel feelings, or at least not those strong ones like love, ceasing all hope in me. Sherlock hated people, well except for one person. Me. _'Is he even gay? Isn't he like asexual…' _

I thought I could just ignore it, push it below the surface and eventually it would dissipate altogether. However from past experience I knew that wasn't going to work. So, I realized maybe bottling it wouldn't work, which brings me to yesterday. Yesterday was the day I told Sherlock about the predicament I found myself in.

* * *

**Lunch the Day Before**

_"Hello Sherlock."_

_"John."_

_Sherlock walked into my room and sat in the armchair next to my desk, his chair._

_"You want to talk."_

_And just like that my fake facade of calm collectiveness faltered._

_Of course he would be able to read me like a book._

_"Ah, yes."_

_"Well then go on. I don't have all day."_

_"Well, it's kind of an emotional subject…"_

_"Prosaic. Boring. Tedious. Dull."_

_"I'm sorry…"_

_"Don't apologize unnecessarily and please continue to your point of this discussion."_

_I swallowed, slightly surprised that he wanted me to continue. I breathed in deeply. This was it, everything would be out in the open._

_"I understand that you may find this odd considering I am your professor, but…I think I may have feelings towards you…"_

_Sherlock blinked several times as if it would somehow make the situation vanish. To no avail. He seemed surprised._

_"Feelings…?"_

_"Yes, those things you divorced yourself from… love… a chemical defect in the losing side as you say."_

_"What a predicament…"_

_I deflated slightly, not sure how to make heads or tails of this reaction._

_"Yes. Quite the predicament."_

_"One I have been finding myself in for a bit as well."_

_What._

_It was my turn to blink rapidly, as if trying to clear my eyes of a fuzz. Did I hear him correctly?_

_"Are you…saying…you reciprocate."_

_"Surely the chemical effects of love haven't impaired your hearing."_

_"No, I just… am surprised… I didn't expect… I assumed…"_

_"Don't assume things John."_

_"For how long?"_

_"Perhaps the first time I had lunch with you."_

_I didn't know what to do but smile._

_"How should we move forward?"_

_I looked at him, unsure as well as to where to go next._

_"I like you and you like me…"_

_"But?"_

_"But, it's illegal and I could get fired."_

_"Sounds dangerous, surely more incentive to. It's not as though we have to tell people…we could keep it strictly outside of school." Sherlock suggested this off handedly and I thought about it._

_"I – yes… I want that…"_

_I looked at him shyly, not sure what to say._

_He seemed just as speechless as me._

_The bell rang._

_He stood up and walked towards where I was sitting._

_He bent over and kissed me on the cheek._

_"I'll text you later."_

_I nodded, speechless, mouth gaped. I looked down at the two untouched lunches, I felt like such a teenager._

* * *

Ever since then I have been in a perpetual state of confusion and joy. When I saw him in class today he smiled at me and sat down making sure no one noticed the bit too friendly way he acted towards me.

Class was about to start so I grabbed my phone and shot a quick text.

_Pay attention and do your work today please? –JW_

_What's in it for me? – SH_

_Date tonight? –JW_

_Fine. –SH_

I smirked at him and began class. Today I lectured them and I actually saw Sherlock take notes. Perhaps Sherlock's education could benefit from our relationship just as much as me.

The class ended and I continued on with my day, yet Sherlock was still in the forefront of my thoughts. A real date tonight? Outside of school? I had never seen Sherlock wear anything but button downs, blazers and dress pants, if that was casual what would he wear on a date?

Soon enough lunch came around.

Sherlock hadn't arrived at the time he usually did.

Perhaps he was a little late.

Ten more minutes. No Sherlock.

Twenty. No Sherlock.

I was beginning to worry.

I waited for the remainder of lunch but no sign of my…boyfriend…? Partner? A discussion to be had then.

_'Where is he?'_

* * *

**(Sherlock's POV)**

I left to my dorm room after John's class. I didn't care much for the dim witted education system that I was stuck in but I found that John and his stupid smile when I did my class work was worth it. Perhaps for a gift one day I could do my homework.

I sat in my dorm staring at the wall waiting out my temptations. Of course, I caved in. I grabbed the needle and a lighter and bag. I prepared myself and the drug and let myself fall into euphoric bliss. I wasn't addicted by any means, yet I did find that my doses had to be increased and I did it more often just to deal with certain stressful situations. I was using it nearly two times a week.

Today's stressful situation was my date with John. Normally I would take it at night and be calm then, but I didn't want John to see me like that. John liked me, I didn't want to botch it up so soon. He reacted dramatically over cigarettes, what would he bloody say if he knew I was using cocaine?

I laid back and let sleep take me.

I woke up in a startle at the shout of my roommate.

"Hey mate! Your phone keeps going off!"

"What time is it?"

"5 P.M."

I sighed, relieved that I hadn't missed their date and still had time but was still upset with myself for missing lunch. I got up from his bed and grabbed my cell phone.

_4 New Messages_

_Sherlock are you running late? –JW_

_Sherlock?-JW_

_Are you ok?-JW_

_I guess I will see you at the front of the school at 5:30? I'll be driving us to the restaurant. –JW_

I shot out a quick, "Sorry, yes see you there-SH". I began getting ready.

I didn't have to change much due to my attire being formal already. All I did was comb my hair and spray some posh cologne John would be sure to love.

I began leaving as Rupert questioned me.

"Are you going on a date?"

"Yes."

"You… You!?"

"Yes, Rupert me."

"Huh…" He trailed off.

I bid him farewell and dashed out of the dorm and to the front of the school.

I made it there with three minutes to spare.

Soon John pulled up in a modest silver car and smiled.

He was wearing a button down shirt and dark blue jeans with a black coat on top. He looked …handsome.

"Come on then. You bloody gorgeous git."

I smirked and approached the car and let myself in.


	7. A New Development pt 2

**Hey there you guys. Welcome back to You Teach Me, the 7th installment in fact! Thank you all for the support, I really appreciate it. Especially you, Attack of the Feels, You are seriously just fantastic!**

**Anyways, I hope you all enjoy. I also hope you can handle angst because it will be coming, but for now here is some cute fluffy happiness. THE CALM BEFORE THE STORM.**

**Also John is 22 and Sherlock is 17. I think that's a good time gap.**  
**Enjoy!~**

* * *

**(John's POV)**

Sherlock approached my car and let himself in.

He looked like he always did, yet somehow more dashing. I couldn't put my finger on it, he wore the same clothes yet somehow it was better…

"John you're staring."

His comment caught me off guard. I blinked surprised, _was it really that obvious?_

"Yes it is that obvious."

_'And he bloody says he is not a mind reader…'_

"I'm not a mind reader John, I just deduced it."

I stuck my tongue at him playfully, "Could've fooled me!"

"Where are we going?" He inquired tilting his head, it was absolutely adorable.

"Deduce it."

"John I have limits."

"It's a surprise!"

Sherlock seemed to be unsatisfied with that answer but gave it a rest. The rest of the ride went on in silence, a comfortable one, not one where you struggle to find words to say as if they're needed but a silence where you are simply content with being there together and saying nothing because nothing needed to be said.

We arrived at a restaurant very shortly and walked in. I didn't know what kind of food Sherlock actually liked because he hardly ever ate so I hoped he was ok with Chinese.

"Good choice." Sherlock remarked as if answering my inner-musings.

We were escorted to a table and handed menus. I knew about this Chinese restaurant but had never eaten here before, and much to my surprise their whole menu was in Chinese. My eyes nervously wandered to Sherlock hoping he knew it.

Sherlock smirked, "Don't you worry, and yes I do speak Chinese. What do you usually eat?"

I sighed and told him what I liked, of course this bloody genius would know Chinese too. Sometimes I forgot he was my student, the guy bloody knew more than I did in most everything. Except for perhaps empathy and human emotions, I am fairly certain a block of wood could trump him in that.

He told the waiter in perfect Chinese what we wanted before looking at me and smiling nervously.

"You know, I have never been with you outside of school…"

I thought about it and realized this was true, this was the first time we have ever seen each other outside of my classroom.

"Well, that will be changing won't it?" I stated, with a hint of questioning in it that I knew Sherlock would be able to pick up on.

"Of course." He said as he turned his body sideways. We were placed in a booth seat that was directly next to a window which conveniently had a nice view of a particularly busy street in central London.

"Good…"

"John, don't be nervous, it's practically like our lunch meetings. Besides, I haven't done this before either… So don't worry, I'm just as unaware of what is socially expected in this situation as you are."

My worries vanished at this. He practically read my mind and figured out what was bothering me. I was very nervous, it was a first date with my student, _Sherlock Holmes _no less.

The waiter approached our table and handed us our food. I immediately began eating, starved after not eating since lunch. Sherlock merely looked at it then brought his attention to me.

"Aren't you going to eat?" I questioned, as I scarfed down the meal, it was fantastic.

"Not if I have to eat like that."

I blushed, slightly embarrassed with my behavior and sat up and began eating slower.

"Sorry…"

"You are perfectly fine John… Perfect…" Sherlock's voice grew quieter, I was pretty sure I wasn't supposed to hear the second perfect but I couldn't help but smile.

"So, how are you?"

Sherlock scoffed, and I wasn't surprised. He hated small talk, but I had no idea what to say.

"Please don't."

I nodded and continued eating.

"That woman over there is glaring. Very religious."

I looked at him slightly confused before realizing that he was right, the woman was glaring at us.  
He must have been deducing her. I wonder what he found out… No matter how many times he did it I couldn't help but feel astonished at it.

"What else do you see?"

And that's how our night went on, I would point to someone and Sherlock would dissect them. We laughed for hours. Occasionally Sherlock would eat a bite of his food which was better than nothing. Eventually we had to leave because it was closing time. I paid despite Sherlock's wishes. We had been there for nearly 5 hours… It was 10 o'clock.

"Oh Sherlock, want me to drive you back to the dormitory…?" I said as we walked outside.

"No… I am fine. I need to go somewhere."

I shot him a suspicious look. _'Does this have to do with why he was arrested?' _All the things that could mean. Hopefully one day Sherlock will confide in me. I nodded knowing I would not win that argument no matter what I said.

"I had a good time…" I said slightly shy.

"I… did too…" He seemed to be even more unsure than me.

I looked at him, god he was gorgeous. I slowly leaned in and kissed him on his lips, they were very soft and perfect. Slowly he slid his tongue in my mouth and I allowed it, our tongues danced and our breathing became heavier. We then separated looking at each other awkwardly.

"Right, well then… uh… good night?"

"Yes, I … good night."

We looked each other in the eyes before chuckling. I walked past him heading towards my car and opened the door and sat in it. I rolled down the window. He leaned in through the open window and kissed my cheek before sauntering off in the opposite direction.

I held my cheek and smiled. The night had gone better than planned. Though I would give anything for him in my bed I have to contain my urges. Sherlock was special, and therefore I needed to take this slow. Not to mention he was my student and this was very risky… I'll have to quit my job if we ever decide to get serious… _Slow down John._

* * *

**(Sherlock's POV)**

I kept striding down the darkened street. I was in a shady part of London. I looked at the ground, I could not stop thinking about my date with John. It was great from the conversations, to the kiss afterwards to John. John. Oh sweet John.

But how hadn't John noticed it?

How hadn't he noticed my hands twitching, or how anxious I was? I thought it was fairly obvious. I sighed, and continued down the street with the sole intent of seeing Victor and getting what I wanted and leaving. Or at least that was until I saw the police cars and tape.

I walked towards the crime scenes to see that DS Lestrade was ordering two other people to survey the body for something. He seemed confused and frustrated. I tried looking at the scene but there were too many police officers out.

I thought of sneaking onto the scene but remembered that the last time I did that I had to hear idiotic yelling until Lestrade saved me. He said he would contact me if he needed help but I knew until he was D.I. him contacting me would be very seldom. I decided looking was worth the risk.

I crouched and looked around to see if anyone had spotted me before crawling around and getting near the scene. What I saw was a white male, mid 20's, 4 stab wounds… clearly post mortem. He was strangled obviously and stabbed afterwards. The knife has obvious fingerprints, it was a poor attempt at a set up. The wife more than likely due to his wedding ring. How dull. I sighed and snuck off the crime scene before I was detected. My previous excitement was deflated due to the absolute idiocy of the murder. Why couldn't there be an intelligent serial killer? Boring!

I began walking again, back on track for what I was originally going to do. Victor Trevor.

I made it to the house and knocked. Victor opened the door and smirked, "Sherlock, to what do I owe this pleasure?"

"You know."

"Oh, straight to business then?"

"Yes, 5 grams."

"5? You're lucky I have that much then. One moment."

"How will you be paying this time around?"

I threw some notes at him and grabbed the baggie and left. He looked surprised as I left. I couldn't risk it. If I had stayed any longer Victor may have tried something and I couldn't… I was dating John now.

I hailed a cab from there knowing from past experiences never to walk by police offers with a bag on cocaine in your pocket in a shady neighborhood. The cab was there soon and I gave them the address to my university. I arrived to the school in about 30 minutes. I walked out and made my way towards the dorms smoking a cigarette as I did so. I made it to my room and walked in trying my hardest not to wake Rupert. Normally I wouldn't care much for such pointless social courtesies but Rupert was alright… he wasn't as bad as Anderson. I took off my blazer and laid on my bed. I hadn't slept in days and my body thought it was about time.

* * *

**-The weekend-**

The weekend was boring. Mycroft texted me saying that he was still watching and to make sure my experiment was over. I didn't get to see John because of his internship at the hospital. I was stuck pacing and hearing Rupert talk about his girlfriend and their stupid domestic problems. I read a few books on bees, which was surprisingly interesting. I got high. I thought about John. I did some of my homework before discarding it due to its absolute redundancy. I did finish the chemistry though, that would be sure to make John smile.

* * *

**So sorry if you were expecting something different. Oh wait, no I'm not. Anyways, next chapter will have an interesting situation, some confrontations, and angst. Oh yeah. And a tad bit of fluff. Hopefully some crime and some lovely… villains to come as well in later chapters.**


	8. Fleeting Presence

**I am really sorry this took so long to get up. Writing blocks and Musicals are very evil.**

**Hey, how goes it? Welcome back to You Teach Me, here we have the 8**

**th chapter. Truly magnificent.**  
**I just want to say, thank you so much for reviews, favorites, follows and PMs. I seriously appreciate any feedback and all. I love you all so much.**

**Without further ado, the new installment. Do the reviewing stuff, I like that.**

**Enjoy!~**

* * *

**(John's POV)**

It had been three and a half weeks since me and Sherlock's first date. The date had gone perfectly in my mind, from the kiss to the conversations I had never felt so…right. But despite this not much between he and I had changed. Aside from the secretive snogging behind my closed classroom doors and dates we were practically the same as always. It wasn't that I expected him to actually be well, like a normal person in a normal relationship I just didn't expect that I would be perfectly okay with it. It was Friday and also coincidentally me and Sherlock's one month. I had planned something for tonight. I was going to invite Sherlock over to my flat. In a normal relationship this may not seem so significant, and also would have already happened a long time ago but it was different with us. We had chosen to take it slow, mostly due to him not having experience and me being one of his professors. Neither of us had been to each other's homes and I knew that this significant step wouldn't be lost out on even Sherlock.

However, even with our new closeness and intimacy I found I still knew very little about him. With every little thing I found out, each question answered another one appeared. For example when his brother had kidnapped me and asked me the "nature of my relationship" with Sherlock. He then proceeded to bribe me to spy on Sherlock. My question as to why Sherlock never spoke about his brother was answered but many more arose. His mother had a lot to answer to, a whole filing cabinet of it.

Suddenly the bell rang, breaking me from my now frequenting thoughts of Sherlock and tethering me back to earth. I got up and opened the classroom door as the kids began to pour in. I made my way back to my desk and began searching for the mop of dark curls. Usually Sherlock was one of the first few to get in but with only two minutes left until class started I began to worry. I looked down at my wrist watch _'30 seconds left…' _It was then that the tall younger boy rushed in and ran to the back of the room where his seat was. I breathed out in relief that he was in fact alive and well. One never knew what to expect with Sherlock Holmes. Before beginning class I gave Sherlock a once over hoping it would give me some information on his tardiness.

Sherlock looked bad. His hair was unkempt and more unruly than usual, bags under his eyes and dark circles darker than bruises. His skin seemed practically translucent and very pale. His cheek bones were even more prominent than usual. His eyes kept darting back and forth and he constantly kept tugging his shirt's cuffs down. It made my stomach turn. I swallowed hard trying hard to hide any indication that I was worried on my face as I began class. I stopped myself realizing that I had to introduce the new student.

* * *

"Hello Class. Happy to see you all on this lovely Friday." I gave the class one of my boyish smiles.

The class muttered amongst themselves about what they were going to be doing tonight.

"Alright, well before we begin I have some news. We have a transfer student from Ireland."

Then everyone began muttering about the new student. Most seemed either indifferent or excited. I looked to the back of the room where the new boy had been standing, not sure where to sit. I gestured for him to come to the front of the room.

The boy was medium height, had short brown hair that was slicked back and wore a suit only making him look even more dapper. He also help himself in a way that seemed very familiar… so aristocratic and graceful… very much like Sherlock. I gestured to the boy to indicate for him to introduce himself.

"Hello, I am James Moriarty but I prefer Jim. I am from Ireland as Professor Watson said… I hope to get along with you all famously." The boy grinned at the class as they clapped. I began to survey the room before realizing the only empty seat left was right next to Sherlock and began asking god to help Mr. Moriarty. I told the boy where to sit, avoiding Sherlock's glare as best as I could and began teaching the class about Stoichiometry.

The class ended fairly quickly. As the students filed out I got up and hasted my way towards the door just in time to catch Sherlock's sleeve. I looked him in the eyes. His eyes were bloodshot and seemed very manic, I flinched back a little before sternly whispering to him.

"You can tell me what's wrong at lunch."

He nodded and I released his arm. I went back to my desk and waited for the next class to come. As I taught I couldn't hide my worry for Sherlock.

* * *

**(Sherlock's POV)**

I circled the campus once more before stomping out my fag and began heading to John's room. I had skipped all of my other classes and opted to smoking and cursing at nothing in particular about the stupidity of my family. As I walked I began to tug at my sleeve again. I cursed at myself for picking up the ridiculous habit. It wasn't _my _fault though, it was _Mycroft's and father's…_They drove me to do this.

I had thought after I left home and could get away from father and could have freedom, things would get better but even now he still managed to get to me. Yesterday Mycroft insisted I go pay mummy a visit because she 'missed' me. Instead of a nice welcome greeting I got a punch to my gut. How lovely we Holmes are. It was because of them… that I began…doing…this… the cutting… the drugs… it was their fault… no, it was mine… I was such a disappointment after all.

And John had noticed that something was off. What was I supposed to say? '_Sorry John, I have been acting weird because I haven't shot up in a week or so now and I spent the whole night slicing my wrists because it's the only way I know how to deal with emotions.' _Yeah that would go over well.

* * *

It was then I noticed that I had already arrived at John's classroom.

I swallowed hard ad turned the doorknob and pulled it open. Inside was John speaking to the new transfer student, Jim Moriarty. Both of their eyes shot up when I walked in and John smiled before addressing James once more.  
"Well, Jim it was nice getting to know you more. If you have any more questions or concerns just tell me."

Jim gave him a smile back and headed to leave. As he passed me I swore I saw him smirk. The same smirk he had on all day during class. Even in my strung out state I knew he had stared at me through the entirety of the class. It didn't bother me per se just unsettled me a bit. I shook my thoughts off and sat down in the chair next to John, my chair. I looked down at the ground as John searched his bag. He threw the bag at me, lunch presumable and I sighed. I didn't have a choice in the matter and quite frankly I was actually hungry. It had been nearly 4 days since I last ate. I continued staring at the floor as we ate.

* * *

"Hello." John broke the silence.

"Hello..."

"So, tell me what's wrong."

Straight to it then. I swallowed down the chewed food and didn't look up. What was there to say?

"Nothing is wrong."

"Yes there is, tell me."

"Nothing!" I nearly shouted.

John sighed, "Sherlock, don't lie to me, your hair is more unruly than usual and your eyes are practically bruised with lack of sleep. You keep darting your eyes around and keep tugging at your sleeve. I may not have known you long but these are not your mannerisms. Tell me what is wrong."

I sighed and looked up at him, I blinked back a few tears and tried to open my mouth. No words came out, I still had no idea what to say. John as if realizing this grabbed my face and forced me to look into those dark blue eyes. "Sherlock, listen to me. If you don't want to you don't have to tell me, but just know that I am here for you. I am here to listen and I always will be. Okay?"

I nodded as he leaned in and kissed me, an act I was not all too familiar with, and I kissed him back. After we separated I told him I would tell him, but not yet. He seemed a little sad but accepted it.

* * *

We ate the rest of the lunch silently. As the bell rang I began to head out but before I left I turned around and looked at him, "Don't think I have forgotten. I know what today is, you can meet me at my dorm whenever you choose." I flashed him a smile before leaving.


	9. Are you Okay?

**Sorry for how long this took to get up.  
Oh my! Look at all these new follows favorites and reviews, why it's enough to make a grown man cry! I mean I'm not grown… or a man…or crying but you get the point. I wanted to say thanks to ALL of you, you guys are the light in my life. Well, theoretically of course. Anyways Chapter 9 of You Teach Me! That's pretty exciting, lots of confrontations in these next few chapters… bit of angst I really hope you all aren't disappointed. Feel free to leave your opinions, I am all ears and I'll try to get the next one up as soon as possible.**

**I have decided to tweak the ages a bit, Sherlock is 17 and John is 22. I like that a bit better.**

**Enjoy!~**

* * *

**(John's POV)**

I swallowed nervously as I knocked on Sherlock's dorm door. I wasn't even sure why I was nervous. Yes, this was our anniversary and I was taking him over to my flat but that wasn't really a reason to be nervous. A few seconds later he opened the door and smiled at me. He looked better than before but still a little disheveled.

"Hello John." He said in his usual deep baritone.

"Hello, are you ready to go?" I looked down at the ground and began kicking my foot around.

"Yes, I am." He said as he went back into his room and came almost immediately back out with his long belstaff coat on.

"Okay, good… then let's go…"

"Let's, and John?" He tilted his head at me.

I hmmed at him.

"You needn't be nervous."

As Sherlock said this I wanted to laugh at myself for being so nervous. Most times I hated that Sherlock could see almost anything but at times like these I was grateful that he did.

We walked out of the school building and went to my car, him sitting up front with me.

"I am going to make us dinner, Is that ok?"

Sherlock gave a noncommittal hum in return. He was looking out the window and his knees were bouncing. He seemed really distant, and this worried me.

"Are you OK?"

Sherlock shot me a glare and I remembered earlier, _no he was not ok._

"Sorry…I will make sure to make this date just perfect then." I said and smiled at him before turning the key and hearing the car turn on. I grabbed his face and pulled him into a short kiss before I began driving. The car ride was quiet but thankfully not too long considering I lived fairly close to the school. When we arrived I grabbed his hands and guided him to the door.

Upon walking in he began to take in his surroundings, I could see him practically analyzing every single thing I owned.

"I like it."

"Thank you Sherlock." I smiled, and was slightly confused and surprised at the unexpected comment.

"I'm going to begin dinner, I hope you like pasta and chicken. Is it okay if I leave you alone for a moment?"

Sherlock nodded and walked to the couch and sat down. He began scratching his forearm, which was a new mannerism he had lately been developing. I didn't think too much of it, but it did strike me as off. He was also uncharacteristically quiet today. Not that he talked all that much to begin with, aside from when he was showing off. I knew he said that he would tell me when he was ready but there was something inside me that wanted to know what was wrong _now_. Maybe that's how Sherlock felt all the time, needing to know things constantly… Maybe he felt that need too, the need to know everything about me.

I walked into the kitchen and began thawing the chicken while letting my thoughts trail off trying to figure out why Sherlock was so off.

* * *

**(Sherlock's POV)**

John was in the kitchen making dinner as I began to look around. His flat was almost empty aside from the furniture, it was rather bland but in a nice comfortable and welcoming kind of way. I scratched at my arm again and cursed myself for it. The cuts were burning. I needed to make it stop, I need… drugs…I need something, anything.

John was beginning to notice how off I was but I didn't know how to hide it. I couldn't tell him… that would drive him away. Away from Sherlock Holmes, the freak, faggot, creep, bastard, druggie. I could not loose John, not so soon… I think I am beginning to… love him? Love is a strong word, one that I haven't used unless talking about my mother and when I was younger, Mycroft. Yet, somehow associating John Watson with love felt fitting. I hate it. All these emotions confused me. I wish I could just turn them off again, that's what the cutting and drugs brought me…an escape…one that I needed so much right now.

I stopped thinking about all of that because I was at John's flat right now and I wanted to have a good time with him. Not to mention it was our anniversary and I would not ruin that, I ruin too many things already. Then it hit me, I was at John's _flat. _I was in his home. To many other couples this could be seen as meaningless but to us… this was… a big deal.

"Sherlock, I finished! Come on let's eat!" John shouted from the kitchen. I near but jumped at the sudden noise, I guess I had been thinking longer than I thought. I made my way to the kitchen and sat down at his table as he served me the food. I began eating with no protest because I didn't want to argue with John. We began talking about at first school, about how idiotic the other students were and how idiotic the other teachers were, then about John's experience with Uni and then I told him my deductions on his flat. We laughed and before we knew it was nearing almost midnight.

"Oh god! You didn't!"

I smiled sheepishly at him, "Did."

"Oh Sherlock, It's really late…"

"I can hail a cab back to my dorm…"

"No, I would prefer you not when it's so late… that's dangerous… You can stay over for the night if you want?" John began blushing and so did I.

"If you want me to…Sure…" I looked at him and smiled, still blushing. _'Bloody emotions.'_

"That'd be …nice." John said and smiled back before getting up and cleaning our used dishes. After he finished we sat down on his couch and he turned on the telly. All the shows were utterly unbearable. The plot lines and 'plot twists' were so utterly predictable that I could barely contain my detestment. I began spouting out my conclusions on each show he put on and he began laughing.

"Sherlock! You could at least warn me if you are going to spoil the finale for me!" John feigned anger and betrayal.

I smiled lopsidedly.

He leaned over and kissed me. I took initiative and grabbed his neck and began working my tongue into his mouth. Our breathing became more labored and our kissing more desperate. He began running his hand through my hair as we deepened the kiss. When we pulled apart we looked at each other with an almost animalistic lust. I was now laying on top of him on the couch, how or when we got to this position was unknown.

Slowly, he began rubbing his groan against mine. I found that I had an erection and each press sent waves of pleasure. I began to rub mine with his as well and smiled at the looks of pleasure he made. We began kissing again this time more broken and full of need.

"Oh- Sh-Sherlock!"

"John." I growled back and received a quiver from John's body in return.

I began to unbutton John's pants as he moaned in pain, needing a release. I pulled them down revealing John's boxers. I took them off as well showing me John's cock, erect and throbbing. Then I did something that neither of us could predict, I took his heat into my mouth and began sucking. John almost protested, but his resolve fell as the pleasure hit him. I had only read about how to do this and found it to be a completely different experience.

"Oh god Sherlock! I'm going to-!" John shouted before a surge of cum exploded into my mouth. I swallowed it trying not to make a face as the white salty and bitter substance made its way down my throat. John fell limp clearly satisfied. My cock was still throbbing but I ignored it, happy to get John off.

* * *

John looked exhausted so we went up to his bedroom and I put him in bed. I decided to lay beside him as he drifted off, spooning me. I smiled to myself as I found myself drifting off as well.

* * *

**(John's POV)**

_BEEP BEEP BEEP _

I groaned and rolled over as my body began waking up. I sat up slowly and rubbed my eyes. My vision began to clear up and I looked over to my side expecting to see Sherlock. Sherlock however was absent. My mind began searching the room as if expecting to find him just hiding in the corner. Unfortunately he was nowhere to be seen. Then my mind was overwhelmed with memories of last night. I smiled remembering how great it was before panicking. _'What if Sherlock didn't want that! What if he decided to leave?' _My mind began to scare itself. I got up and went to the living area of my flat hoping maybe Sherlock was there. He wasn't, but then I noticed a note on the coffee table. I picked it up and unfolded it. Inside was the elegantly sloppy handwriting of Sherlock Holmes.

__

Hello John, Sorry If my absence made you panic. Everything is fine, I was requested to return home to the manor to see my mother who is sick. I took it upon myself to set your alarm so you wouldn't miss your internship at Bart's. Have a good day. –S.H.

I smiled as I read it. That considerate and caring bastard. I looked at the time and found I had only 30 minutes left and hastily grabbed an oatmeal colored jumper and pair of jeans and hopped into a shower. I put on my shoes and was out the door on my way to Bart's. When I arrived, I signed myself in as usual and went down to the clinic.

The day was slow and unexciting but I didn't notice with all the thoughts of Sherlock clouding my mind. Before I knew it I was back at home grading papers. I had assigned them all several questions about limiting reagents and supernatants. Then something caught my attention. The assignment itself wasn't what caught my attention.

It was Sherlock's paper.

It was filled out but nearly all the answers were either half filled out or incorrect, or both. It wasn't odd for Sherlock to not finish his work, that was something I was growing used to, what was odd was that when Sherlock did do it, it was _always _correct. I hated that with a brilliant mind like Sherlock's, that he refused to do his work but I knew I couldn't do much about it. Sometimes though he would do his work and when he did it was brilliant and well worded, and correct. This was not like the curly headed genius at all. I re-read the paper again trying to see if I could get anything else out of it. Then I noticed something. In the corner of the paper there were a few smudges. The smudges were rusty red and had an interesting texture. Then a realization hit me. It was… no… it couldn't be… was that _blood?_ I began to feel queasy as I looked at it again.

Blood. On Sherlock's paper. The same paper with all the wrong answers. I rubbed my forehead and rubbed my aching stomach, _'What is going on?'_

I hastily grabbed my phone from my coat that was draped on my desk chair and typed out a message, fingers trembling as I did so.

_Sherlock, we need to talk. –JW_

I clicked send and waited, staring at the phone as if it would make Sherlock reply faster. After five minutes of no reply I began to worry a little. After ten, I began to worry a lot.

_Sherlock always replies._

* * *

**Oh goodness, that doesn't sound good does it? I hope you enjoyed and stay tuned for next week. If they seemed OOC it's because I believe that back then Sherlock wasn't the emotionless 'sociopath' we all love today, I believe that he went through things that changed him. As well as John, with the war. So there's my justification of that. **


	10. Emotions are Meaningless

**Hey there, nice to see you again. I am SO SORRY this took longer than a week. A lot of things have been happening and it hasn't been the best of times but I promised that I would update no matter what. So here is a fair warning: This chapter will In fact contain some angst and suicide/self-harm feels. I am not sorry. I hope to see you all again next time.**

**Enjoy!~**

* * *

**(Sherlock's POV)**

I groaned as I rolled over in attempt to stop my mind from turning itself back on. The lights from the room beginning to penetrate my eyes. It was so bright, brighter than regular household lights. Everything was a burst of white and pain and I opened my eyes. My vision was blurry but through the haze I could make out the figure standing in front of my bed. As my vision cleared up I realized where I was.

"Wh-Why am I at a-" I couldn't finish the sentence, finding myself extremely thirsty. As if Mycroft could read my mind he handed me a cup of water. As I drank the liquid the burn in my throat subsided. I looked at him waiting for an answer, knowing that he full well knew what I was trying to ask.

"Do you not remember?"

I shook my head, _'Remember what?'_

"I found you… you were on the floor covered in blood… your pulse was very weak Sherlock…"

I nodded. Suddenly a wave of memories from the night before hit me.

_"Your mother is sick!"_

_"Will caring help her? It's not my fault! I can not change her illness!"_

_"You ungrateful brat!" my father flung his arms at me and threw me on the ground._

_He began kicking me, as I choked back the tears I did what I had learned to do after years of this. I stopped feeling._

_He kept hitting me and my world kept getting darker and blurrier but I did not cry, I felt nothing._

* * *

"Sherlock? Sherlock!"

"Yes…?"

"You weren't responding…"

"I remember…"

"Did dad hit you?"

I remained silent.

"Is this the f-first time?" Mycroft stuttered, he sounded worried. _'Caring isn't an advantage.' _

"No."

"Why? Why didn't you tell me?"

"You were busy being… perfect…" my words were slurring. _'What did they give me?'_

"Sherlock, you-"

"I need to see John."

"Sherlock, you need to rest."

I tried getting up but found that I didn't have the energy to do so.

"Sherlock, have you been cutting yourself?" Mycroft was looking at my wrists.

"No…"

"Sherlock, do not lie. Do I need to take you somewhere? Why would you do that?"

"No… Just give me my phone… I need to talk to John…"

Mycroft sighed, he seemed resigned as he handed me my mobile. He walked out of the room twirling his umbrella as he did so.

Once I had the phone I noticed that there were 7 messages from John.

_Sherlock, we need to talk –JW_

_Sherlock?-JW_

_Sherlock, Are you okay? –JW_

_I found blood on your paper. –JW_

_Sherlock please tell me you are ok. –JW_

_I love you. –JW_

_Please be ok. – JW_

_'Oh god… I am so sorry John.'_

_John. I am sorry… it's ok… everything is ok… -SH_

I sent the message but immediately regretted it. No, everything was not okay. Would lying really be helpful?  
All this proves is that I am not fit to deal with emotions. Not even cutting brings me the same control. All because of this stupid chemical defect… After a few minutes of not receiving a reply from John I put my phone on the bedside table and slept.

* * *

**(John's POV)**

"Have a great day, Mrs. Lancaster."  
I smiled to her as she slid off the clinic bed and left the clinic. I sighed and ripped off the latex gloves, happy to finish another day's work. I grabbed my bag and walked out, saying goodbye to my colleagues. Once I finally got outside I took the phone from my back pocket and turned it on. The screen lit up and the menu began loading. Then I noticed I had 3 messages from Sherlock.

My heart sunk.

He hadn't been responding for the past 24 hours and I was on edge. I opened the messages with extreme caution, worried of what I might see.

_John. I am sorry… it's ok… everything is ok… -SH_

_I didn't mean to make you worry. It's not blood, it was ketchup. –SH_

_I love you… -SH_

I wiped the tear rolling down my cheek. Why was I crying? Because I am happy Sherlock is ok, or is it because he is still lying to me? I kept walking, noticing the people now beginning to stare at me. I quickly typed out a message in response, trying my best to calm myself down. _'Oh Sherlock…'_

_Sherlock, are you ok? What happened? Please the truth. I love you too. –JW_

I waited for a response as I turned the corner, seeing my flat in sight.

_I'm not ok. I am in the hospital. I am so sorry. –SH_

My heart lurched and I had to bite down on my tongue to stop myself from crying out._ 'The hospital!?' _

_Sherlock, I know it was blood. I am training to be a doctor remember? Please tell me… -JW_

_I told you I would when I feel ready. –SH_

_Sherlock! I need to know now… my boyfriend is in the hospital and I bloody well want to know why! –JW_

I could tell my anger was rising and that I should stop it but I couldn't. He didn't want to tell me what was wrong or trust me… What kind of a relationship is that? _'You're in a relationship with Sherlock Holmes. Right. Normal doesn't apply.'_

_Just because you're in a relationship with me doesn't mean you have a right to all of my personal life. I don't need you. Caring is not an advantage. –SH_

_Right. You don't bloody need me. Well talk to me when you do then. –JW_

I grabbed the keys from out the door and slammed the door shut behind me. How dare he! Doesn't need me? Right. I know that maybe if I let my head clear and my anger to stop that maybe I would be able to figure out the connection between the paper and the hospital but I couldn't stop the rage.

I grabbed my keys and closed the door. I hailed a cab to go to a pub.

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**So this whole chapter seemed kind of meh to me, but I mean I swear when I update again I will make up for it. I am sorry for the wait, I truly am. **


	11. Smirk

**What? Two updates in under a week? No way! Welcome back boys and girls, yes another chapter. My writing block disappeared so I took advantage of it. I hope you all enjoy. Thank you soo much for all the support and reviews and favorites and follows just KDFJSDNSDM**

**Enjoy!~**

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**(John's POV)**

I groaned and rubbed my head as I checked the time. Five minutes before class started and I would have to brave my way through giving a lecture with a hangover. _'Maybe drinking on a Sunday night wasn't a great idea after all.' _I straightened my dark blue cardigan and licked my lips involuntarily.

_I could not stop thinking about Sherlock. _

I was angry. Angry that Sherlock didn't want to tell me the truth or could even trust me. Angry of how obstinate and childish he was being especially when he said, "_Caring is not an advantage." _But more than angry, I was worried. Worried because the last time we spoke, which was almost 24 hours ago, he said he was in the hospital: _'Was he hurt? Did a family member fall ill? Did he fall ill? Was he dying?' _I was also worried because of the paper with blood on it. Sherlock had said it was ketch-up but there was two obvious faults in that. One, Sherlock hardly ever ate unless his body forced him and two, I was not as stupid as he liked to think. Those factors combined made me even more worried, Sherlock was always so thorough and careful with his lies but this one was so blatantly obvious. Where did the blood come from? _'Perhaps he got beat up again?' _It was the only conclusion that made sense that I could think of and I prayed that it was something different.

I grabbed my mobile from my pocket and checked the time again, class would begin in 2 minutes. No Sherlock.

_I could not stop thinking about Sherlock._

**(Sherlock's POV)**

"You're going to be discharged in 3 hours." Mycroft's voice boomed in a dead pan, I could see him set his umbrella down and sit in one of the leather armchairs through the corner of my now cracked open eye. I grinned a little at his statement, beyond happy about leaving, I was getting excruciatingly bored.

"Ok."

"Are you going to talk to me?"

I rolled my eyes at my brother's statement, knowing full well what he meant. "I am."

"Sherlock." Mycroft warned in a stern tone.

"What do you want me to say?"

"How do you feel about it? Anything. Actually, tell me… how long."

I sighed, I did not want to have this conversation but I knew that I had to.

"Well you're the smart one, you tell me how long," I responded, each word dripping with sarcasm and a hint of hostility.

Mycroft breathed out heavily and rubbed his nose, "Please, Brother Mine."

Tired and bored of the bickering already, I curtly responded, "11 years."

Mycroft's mouth fell open, staring at me incredulously. "11 years?"

"Brother dear, we both do hate repetition."

"How didn't I-"

I cut him off knowing what he was going to say, "Because you were too busy making connections and manipulating everything to notice."

"Y-you were 7…"

"Yes I was." I tried to hide any emotion as I watched Mycroft stare at me in utter despair and bewilderment. Sentiment.

"I thought caring wasn't an advantage?"

"All rules have exceptions…" Mycroft muttered before leaving the room, threats of tears in his eyes. I was confused. Mycroft _never_ cried.

After a few minutes I got up and grabbed my mobile from the bedside table that was pushed to the other side of the hospital room. I turned the screen on and opened the menu. My finger began hovering over the option: _'Compose Message'. _Out of memory my fingers selected it and chose the name John Watson before I could stop them, remembering the day before. _'He is done with you.' _ I sighed and put my phone back where it was and plopped down onto the bed and shut my eyes.

_'John.'_

* * *

I wasn't surprised that John had finally given up on me, in fact I was surprised he stuck around for this long. He stayed longer than anyone else had before. Everyone always left and I knew why. Sometimes they left because they thought I was a freak, a sociopath, but more often than not it was just because I became bored of them and pushed them away. I learned at a young age that I didn't need friends, friends were dull. My whole life I was comfortable with that fact but then this…John Watson… came and ruined that, made me fall in love…. Think irrationally.

That's why I had to push John away.

I couldn't think with him, I was filled with emotions. He would become a weakness. He also kept prying, wanting to know things about me. If he found out… he would hate me… call me a freak like everyone else. So cut off the extra limb. Emotions are irrational and a weakness so I will choose to opt out of them.

I looked to the machine on the side of my bed and clicked the up button on my morphine levels. I was leaving in 2 hours so I decided to exploit this luxury.

"Sherlock, you're being discharged." Mycroft stated, shaking my shoulders. I opened my eyes slowly and sat up. I was still in a morphine induced bliss so I didn't argue. Mycroft noticed this fact.

"Brother Dear, I suggest you don't dwell on past experiments." I looked at his face to see the warning look on it. It meant 'If you keep doing it, you'll force my hand.' I nodded and stood up, ready to leave.

"Manor or the college?"

"Manor, you still have some injuries needing to be recovered and mummy wants to see you."

_'Father...' _I flashed him a look of hesitance, I did not want to go back to the man who put me in this bed to begin with. Mycroft, being as observant as me saw my hesitance and put his hand on my shoulder in effort to calm and comfort me.

"Sherlock, surely you wouldn't think I would let him stay there. Right now we're in the process of getting him a sentence. Mummy agrees with this outcome as well."

I nodded, relieved and slightly happy that Mycroft was controlling for once.

"Good, but I do need you to talk to mummy. She is worried…you can just imagine what the news did to her when she heard."

I groaned, understanding but dreading all the inevitable coddling. "How long?"

"I have Korean elections so just 3 days."

I began walking out with Mycroft. I realized that I was being compliant but I knew in a few hours when I came down it would be hell. I got into the slick black car and sighed. There was only one thing on my mind that shouldn't be.

_John._

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**(John's POV)**

Four days. Four whole days since me and Sherlock had last talked. It was Thursday and he still hadn't come to class and it seems his dorm as well. To say I was worried was an understatement, I was beginning to think the worse. I still didn't know what happened, why he was at the hospital but I had a bad feeling about it. I sent another text to him saying the same thing I had wrote over and over for the past 3 days.

_I'm sorry. I love you, please talk to me. Are you ok? –JW_

I sighed and began the day.

"Hello class today we're doing a lab. You will be doing it with your table partner, Jim you can join another group."

After they grouped together I explained how to do the lab and let them begin. The class went by excruciatingly slow and boringly, mostly because a Sherlock Holmes wasn't present. Once class was over the students began filing out except for one. James Moriarty, the Irish transfer student. Ii put on my best fake smile, knowing I wasn't up to it to make a real one.

"Hello James, to what do I owe this pleasure?"

"Hello Mr. Watson, I was wondering if you could give me Sherlock's make-up work and assignments so I could bring it to him."

I tried my hardest to hide my surprise, _'Sherlock doesn't have friends… how does he know where Sherlock is? Where is Sherlock' _Knowing that if I didn't say yes it would seem suspicious and hoping for some information I nodded.

"Sure, one moment." I bent over and pulled a stack a papers from my drawer with a post-it note on top saying 'Sherlock Holmes'. I handed it to Jim.

"Is he alright?"

"Yes, he is just recovering. Thank you." Jim drawled out in his Irish tone and turned to leave. I saw a hint of a smirk right before he went out the door. '_Recovery? So Sherlock got hurt… oh …god…'_

Then I thought about that smirk. It seemed knowing. It was unsettling like it knew about my deepest secrets. I swallowed hard as the next class began coming in.

Something about that smirk was _wrong._

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**_Hope you all liked it, review and Pm me! _**


	12. Connecting Things

**God, 11 days… that's inexcusable I know. I am so sorry I just… Was really busy. So please forgive me! I am really trying to stay consistent. Thank you as well for all of your faith in this story and reviews and all that jazz. It seriously makes my day when you guys tell me about my story. So thanks for that. I PROMISE YOU THAT I WILL UPDATE FASTER. I mean it, for serious this time.**

**Warning: Yes, there is a lot of fluffy make-up bull shit. Yes, a bit OOC, Shh, I can't give you angst all th time gosh.**

**Enjoy!~**

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**(Sherlock's POV)**

"Sherlock, dear, I love you. Please visit more and stay out of trouble!" My mother pulled me into a hug and I stood there awkwardly as she did so.

The past 3 days she was overbearing to say the least. I was thrilled to finally leave the clutches of my mother and my childhood memories but I wasn't ready for what lay ahead of me at the college.

_John._

Ever still on my mind was John, and it was driving me mad. I couldn't even do simple chemical filtering without getting distracted and spilling it. The constant texts weren't helping either. They left me at lost. I was so sure that he was done with me, the last conversation we had made it fairly clear that he was done. Yet, he sent messages telling me he loved me and begged me to speak with him. I also find myself constantly debating replying with a flurry of apologies and pleas but perhaps I read the situation wrong. Maybe he was only doing it so when I begged for him back he could laugh.

_I don't understand human nature._

I sighed, hearing my phone buzz. I looked down at the screen and saw 1 new message received from John Watson. I looked at it like it was a bomb ready to detonate if I didn't disarm it. As I walked out the manor door and towards the black car that would take me back to the college I subconsciously clicked the select button and opened the message.

Sitting in the car, I looked at my phone again, surprised to see the message open and these words staring at me:

_Sherlock, please, I can't keep begging. I just want to know you're alright. I know we fought, but it's what couples do. They fight. Please, just… give me something. I love you. –JW_

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I swallowed hard looking at this message. John sounded desperate and it hurt me a little that I was putting him through that. I also felt a bit oblivious_. 'it's what couples do. They fight.'_ So John was saying that he wasn't done? That it was in fact just an ordinary… domestic? '_How domestic. Look how far you have fallen Sherlock. Surely you know caring isn't an advantage.' _Mycroft's voice sneered inside my head.

Yes, caring wasn't an advantage, but with John Watson I couldn't help it. Shaking away from the negative thoughts I thought about John's text again and found myself feeling utterly idiotic. I had overreacted and worried John in the process. I was so sure I had to push John away, so sure he was done with me just like the rest of them were, so sure I was left to be alone again… How ridiculous. This chemical defect would be the death of me, but surely John was worth it, my chemistry professor, _my John._

I looked up from my mobile and looked out the window, the outside was slightly cloudy but clearer than yesterday. I found it laughable that the weather cleared up as my mind did. I would call it some sort of sign if Ii weren't so adverse to superstitions and didn't find them utterly useless and idiotic. I looked back at the phone and my thumb hovered over the 'reply' option. I was hesitant, apologizing wasn't something I was accustomed to.

_John, I am fine. I am sorry for the distress. Please forgive me. I love you as well. –SH_

I sighed a bit as I sent it, not giving it a second glance knowing that if I thought about it I would take it all back. As I waited for John's reply I found my hands were shaking. _'Ha! Shaking… Yes, emotions truly were a weakness…One I will risk, for no one else but John.'_

_Of course I forgive you. I am so happy to see you're ok. What happened? I'm sorry for getting mad at you. –JW_

The questions blurred together as I read the text. John seemed a bit jumpy, even through texting I could tell he was startled by my reply and I couldn't help but wonder what went on in his mind as he typed it. Before replying I thought about my options once more. Did I really want to risk this, this all deafening chemical defect called love, or did I want to divorce myself from it all? The answer seemed easy.

_We'll talk about it when I get back, ok? –SH_

I sent the message then noticed we had arrived back at St. Bart's. I nodded at the driver and left the car, heading to my room. As I walked into the building my pocket buzzed so I reached in and grabbed the offending device.

_Alright. Also, did Jim bring you your make-up work? –JW_

I thought back to my interaction with Jim at the manor and shuddered.

_"Sherlock! Someone is here to give you some work." His mother called out in a sweet tone she reserved for new guests._

_I tilted my head at myself in curiosity as I heard a set of footsteps go up the stairs. As I waited the steps got louder until they were right next to my door. I heard a light knock on the dark mahogany wood._

_"Come in."_

_As the doorknob turned and the door slowly opened I was met with the well-dressed transfer student, Jim Moriarty._

_"Here is your make-up work, I thought as you recovered you would want it." Jim slurred out in his Irish drawl and I found myself deducing. 'Well groomed hair with product, underwear line clearly visible…gay.' I stopped myself before I got too lost in my head and reached out to grab the papers._

_"Thank you."_

_"Of course."_

_"How did you know where I live?"_

_"Oh you know." Jim smirked and left my room just as quickly as he entered. I sat in stunned silence as he left the manor. That smirk, the same as the one from his first day. The same smirk that put me on edge, made my stomach turn._

_**  
**As I looked at the stack of papers I found one singular piece of paper separate to the rest. I grabbed it and unfolded it. On the paper read:_

_Oh, Sherlock. You see and observe, but can you figure it out?_

_I have a game for you. It will be long and tedious for a while but I promise you, it will fix it:_

_Our final problem. –J.M._

_xoxo_

_I re-read it again and again but found no new deductions. J.M. as in Jim Moriarty? The insignificant transfer student I sat next to out of requirement? The ordinary homosexual?_

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I broke from the memory finding myself at the front of my dorm. Before opening the door I shot out a quick text saying I received the work and had to go. Upon walking in I found Rupert lounging around in the room.

"Mate, you're back!"

"Obviously."

"Oh that charm of yours, how I missed it!"

"Are you intoxicated?"

"Of course not!"

I shot him a confused look before losing interest and plopping down on my bed. I had classes tomorrow, which meant seeing John. Seeing John meant I could stop thinking about him. Not thinking about him meant I could focus on other things that needed my concentration, like J.M.'s game.

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**Okay, I'll be honest here I am half asleep, worrying about my proficiency tests and extremely disappointed in this chapter. Hopefully by the end of this week I'll be more into it. **


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